2010 Can Bite Me

So, it's New Year's Eve tonight. This is probably what I would consider to be the Drunk's Holiday. A lot of people will be getting completely plastered (and hopefully not driving) and making total asses of themselves.

I made split pea soup tonight in the hopes that I'll be able to get drunk enough to get sick. Drunk people will freak out if you look like you're being possessed. I wonder how many people will be yelling, "The Power of Christ compels you!" and throwing their booze on me.

My brother told me a story the other day about scaring a teacher. He was walking down the school hallway with a few of his friends and he sneezed. One of the teachers walking by said, "God bless you."

He started talking in Latin (the few words he happens to know from TV), growling, and roaring in a really deep voice, twitching like the words had actually hurt him.

It's amusing that this comes from the kid who woke us up screaming one night because he thought Satan was levitating him off of his bed.

But besides it finally being over, what exactly was so great about this last year? The only thing that stands out is the repeal of Don't Ask, Don't Tell. For a while, I dreamt of being in the Air Force, but I couldn't bear the thought of having to keep mum about my relationships. I mean, what is there in this world greater than love? Nothing.

Face it, he last year of the decade touted as 'The Future!' kinda sucked. Where are the flying cars, damn it?

In West Philadelphia...

I turn 23 in February. In two years, I'll be 25. 25 more years after that, I'll be 50 years old. Hopefully I'll have children and a life that doesn't involve laying in bed all day, staring at a computer screen with a cat on my ass.

And when I'm 50, I won't just have pictures of my youth to show. I'll have youtube to showcase what idiots my friends and I were, chasing after wasps with glass jars.

In just a few more years, there will be people old enough to enter the White House as President knowing all the lyrics to the Pokémon theme song. We'll soon have a President that grew up watching the Fresh Prince of Bel Air and Power Rangers. I bet you can still sing the theme songs to Animaniacs and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

Our parents probably can't find most of the cartoons they grew up on unless they were Disney movies. I watched Darkwing fucking Duck the other day. I have all the episodes of the Real Ghostbusters cartoon!

We have the best, the most, the greatest. We'll be able to carry our childhoods with us forever.

Of course, there are probably things best left in the 90's. Spice World and It's Pat come to mind.

This is all Seth's fault

I've never really had a blog for my writing before, but after conversing with a friend today, I got to looking through some of my old things and decided to try blogging.

I remember the first story I ever wrote. It was for a friend in elementary school and I wrote it during recess on the library computers and saved it on one of those enormous 5 1/4in floppy disks that didn't have as much memory as a new calculator does.

The story was pretty much just a Sleepy Beauty rip with her name and the Prince Charming was a boy she liked. It was one page and made a terrible birthday present for a ten-year-old.

I ended up writing a lot of fanfiction in high school, but it's really been a while since I've written anything besides Facebook statuses. I'm trying to write a children's book for my best friend's two little girls, but I'm having trouble figuring out where it's going to go.

I'm hoping that this will help me get back into writing, and maybe I'll be able to make a few people laugh along the way.